Cousins by the Dozens

My mother, Beatrice, was one of 14 children. Ten of the children married and had children and their children have had children and even some of their children have had children. It goes without saying, Lin and I have beaucoup cousins. Unfortunately, we don't get to see them often … funerals seem to be the usual occasion for get-togethers lately … not the best venue for cousin fun and merriment. We thought we'd like to change it a bit this year. Three of Bea's sisters are still living and visiting them seemed like a wonderful way to share my mom's spirit this Christmas and perhaps catch up with some cousins, too.

It was too late to plan anything very formal, but we were hoping to get as many cousins together as possible for a Cousins' Christmas. We ended up doing it on two separate days. Truth be told, Lin and I didn't have to do much in the Coordination Department. Cousin Mark handled the Connery side of the clan in Clinton, Massachusetts. Aunt Jeannette had seven kids. They all married and they have kids (and yes, some of their kids have kids.) I don't even know most of the second or third cousins. Keeping track of the first cousins has always been a challenge unto itself. I believe “herding cats” was the chore at hand for Mark, but he managed remarkably well. The one-hour drive to Clinton was filled with sisters singing Christmas carols and admiring the new snowfall on the evergreens. After a delightful visit with our 90-year-old auntie, we descended upon cousin Theresa's home for a cousin reunion and brunch. We ate and drank and kibbitzed the day away. There was no dearth of conversation, nor old stories nor laughter.

Cousin Maelee is the go-to cousin for getting folks together and spreading the word throughout the other families and she did an incredible job of getting in touch and gathering the clan. The next day, we headed to Aunt Bette's house. She's now the matriarch of the family and her house is a good gathering spot for family. At 91, she still lives alone in the same house she's lived in for over 70 years  years in Oxford, Massachusetts. She was beaming when we arrived. She's always been social and having crowds of family in her tiny house seemed to delight her. There were cousins everywhere. Aunt Vickie, the baby girl of the Lacoste family at age 84, managed a visit despite recouping from heart issues earlier this year. Once again, eating and drinking intermingled joyfully with hugging, reminiscing, joking, and unbridled laughter. We did cousin stuff and we did it loudly and with much gusto. Absolute cousin bedlam ensued … it was outstanding. In the photo, that's Aunt Vickie at center left and Aunt Bette on the right. David and Nikki … thanks for the pic.

I don't remember having seen this many cousins since I was a little girl and our grandmother celebrated her 75th birthday at a grand family reunion at my aunt's farm. I'd forgotten how wonderful cousins can be. All from the same stock; all branches from the same family tree; all a part of me and me, a part of them. We parted with promises to stay in touch and get together soon. Maybe we will; maybe we won't; but these past two days have been a highlight of my Christmas season. Thanks, cousins!

We're posting this on Christmas Eve and though we're apart, David and I are together in spirit (and via Skype several times a day!!). We wish you all a very happy holiday.

Road Trip!

We always anticipate a road trip with great enthusiasm. Our oldest son, Brennan, and his wife, Hannah, live in Washington, DC and carving a weekend in busy December to travel to Boston was a challenge. Meeting half-way in Princeton, New Jersey, however, was a bit more doable. Despite Lin's bum foot, she was game for the trip and I was ecstatic. Road trip!!!  East coast states are small … four hours travel, 270 miles through four states. After several days of grey skies, we woke to sunshine  for a change … a great day for a trip.

Princeton, New Jersey is a university town … home of the prestigious Ivy-league Princeton University. Princeton was founded in 1746 and, according to Wiki, has been associated with 37 Nobel laureates, 17 National Medal of Science winners, two Abel Prize winners, eight Fields Medalists (more than any other university), nine Turing Award laureates,  three National Humanities Medal recipients and 204 Rhodes Scholars. By endowment per student, Princeton is the wealthiest school in the United States with over 21 billion dollars in endowments. Two U.S. Presidents (James Madison and Woodrow Wilson) and three vice presidents (who cares?) have graduated from Princeton University, making it the fourth largest producer of commander-in-chiefs and veeps.  Albert Einstein lived in Princeton for over 20 years. Pretty impressive, huh? All that, and ivy on the walls!

We weren't here for a university education, but university towns are always interesting and offer lots to visitors. Brennan and Hannah arrived mid-afternoon, and after hugs, beers and some Christmas present opening, we bundled up and headed downtown for a little exploring before dinner. The downtown was a-glitter with twinkling lights, classy Christmas decorations and Christmas trees. It was wonderful … candy for the eyes.

We found the pleasant, very-crowded Triumph brew-pub and bellied up to the bar to warm up … inside and out. We all ordered a different brew and sampled each others. Needless to say, we were quite jovial and spirits ran high after an hour or so of “warming up”.

Dinner followed at Agricola, a farm-to-table type eatery, specializing in “seasonal American dining”. Having been a Latin teacher in my younger days (yes, I hate to admit it, but I taught high school Latin at one point in my life), I made a point of declining this noun for my family and pointing out it is one of the few first declension Latin nouns that is masculine. They were not impressed. Old joke: Latin teachers never die; they just decline. David was missed, but we Skyped while we were all together, so got a chance to talk to everyone.

Lin and I returned to Princeton University in the morning and wandered around so we could appreciate  the campus and grounds in the daylight. It's a grand place … stately and steeped in history and tradition.

All in all, a good road trip and a great visit. Now for the ride home!

Staying versus Leaving

We blog frequently about the compromises we make living on a boat. Whether it be doing without amenities like a freezer or hot water, or negotiating work versus play days, there always seems to be give and take in our live-aboard life. Making the decision to fly home for Christmas this year was one of the more difficult compromises we've made lately. Being apart has been more the norm than the exception these past couple of years, so opting to be apart when there was no real family emergency seemed a bit inconsiderate on my part. Yet, David encouraged me to go and spend the holidays with my sister.

I treasure the holiday season. David enjoys it, but it's not that important to him. “David, I'm going to decorate the boat for Christmas.” “Okay, honey, have at it.” If it gets decorated, wonderful. If it doesn't, no worries. I go for lots of lights and faux evergreen garlands, fresh flowers when we can find them, stuffed stockings and a  traditional roast turkey dinner with all the trimmings. David loves the food aspect, and cheerfully participates with my holiday-mania, but the rest is all fluff to him. We even negotiate how soon and how often I'll play Christmas music on the boat. He's reluctant to hear the same Christmas CDs (we only have two) much before December 1st. Me? I could start playing them in July without a problem.

In the past, we've celebrated Christmas in Florida, Ecuador, Chile, Tasmania, New Zealand, South Africa, and Australia … sometimes with a group and sometimes just the two of us. We always manage to make the the day cheery, but there's something about picking out a Christmas tree and decorating it, and all the other festivities that lead up to the holiday that put me in the spirit.

David and I talked about this at length before I made the plane reservations. I wanted him to come back with me. He preferred to stay and work on the boat rather than travel back to the States for a couple of weeks. He'll rack up some “cave time” and get lots of projects completed by the time I return.

What it all comes down to is compromise once again. Beyond doing things for the boat and maintaining our live-aboard, gypsy lifestyle, sometimes we need to do things for ourselves as individuals. So I'll be in Boston sister-ing over the holidays and David will be in Durban Nine-of-Cupping and come the New Year … we'll be ready to start living the good life once again … together.