It's Hard to Pass Up A Good 'Thing'

From El Paso until we crossed into Arizona as we cruised along I-10, we saw billboards for ‘The Thing’. The first couple were pretty much ignored, but as they continued for miles and miles, we started to wonder exactly what ‘The Thing’ was. Exactly the effect, we’d suspect, the ‘Thing’ was hoping for. There isn’t much else at I-10, Exit 322 Benson, Arizona, but our interest was piqued. When we saw the Exit Now sign, we needed a leg stretch anyway, so we stopped. We’d already determined that if the admission price was too high, we’d give it a pass. We set the limit at $5. The senior rate was $4. We tromped to the back of the kitschy souvenir/gift shop and paid our admission.

Road signs for ‘the Thing’ were displayed for miles and miles and miles

The exhibit brochure prepped us for what was to come. “Join us on a journey of imagination, speculation, and conspiracy. Allow yourself to believe that everything you were told about history is false… devised to shelter the citizens of the Earth from the truth… governments have tried to suppress the facts.” Okay then… let’s take the ‘journey’ into the conspiracies, cover-ups and concealment that’s evaded people of the world for millennia.

What if… is the theme of this unique ‘museum’ / roadside attraction

Aliens controlled dinosaur minds?

‘What if?’ is the theme of the place. A labyrinth of hallways and corridors led us past exhibits ranging from dinsosaurs to a Conestoga wagon to a vintage Rolls Royce midst lots of mood music, dim lighting and colorful artwork. The premise is that since the Mesozoic era, aliens have been present on Earth, controlling everything from dinosaur minds to world governments. Aliens are divided into two groups… good and peaceful (Ammattrians) and evil and aggressive (Mylzerathians). Throughout Earth’s history, these aliens have been at odds. The wicked Mylzerthians sent an asteroid to destroy the Earth after losing a war to the Ammattrians, thus ending the dinosaur reign.

What do all of the above myths and legends have in common? Blame it all on the aliens.

When life on Earth recovered, the good guys returned to help humanity, but of course, so did the bad guys. According to the proposed theory, it would have been virtually impossible for mere humans to make such rapid advances in technology throughout the ages without the good aliens helping them. The bad aliens were blamed for everything from the Dark Ages, the US Civil War, WW1, Hitler and the Nazis and WWII. It was the benign Ammattrians who provided the US with the knowledge to develop nuclear technology to end WWII. The exhibit also went on to provide ‘logical’ extraterrestrial explanations for Sasquatch, the Loch Ness Monster, the Abominable Snowman, crop circles, Easter Island Moai, Stonehenge, and the Nazca Lines among other things. Okay… had enough?

We were still wondering about the ‘Thing’ though… where was it and what was it? “Legend has it that in the 1890s, a mysterious creature was unearthed deep within a copper mine of southern Arizona. The discovery was so mysterious and controversial, the facts were hidden from the public.” Aha… now we were getting somewhere. Just around the next corner, there it was… ‘the Thing’.

Meet ‘The Thing’… not as exciting as the hype. Dim lighting and mummy under glass makes for poor photography, but really, there wasn’t much to see.

Unfortunately, it was pretty anticlimactic. It was presumably a mummified body (or facsimile thereof) under glass in a mine shaft setting, proving something, but what we haven’t a clue.

Zoltar the alien tells fortunes!

Back to reality. First of all, I must admit that the quality of the exhibits, though far-fetched, was actually pretty good… weird, but interesting. I did a little research on the history of this roadside attraction and that’s exactly what it is. According to Wiki, originally “The object [the Thing] ... is believed to have been made by exhibit creator Homer Tate for sideshows. Based out of Phoenix, Tate produced a variety of curiosities like faux shrunken heads. The Thing was purchased by former lawyer Thomas Binkley Prince in the mid-twentieth century, who quickly based a tourist attraction around the strange object. Although Prince died in 1969, the attraction was run by his wife Janet for many years. Today, the site is under the ownership of Bowlin Travel Centers, Inc.” The facility also includes a Shell station and a Dairy Queen to further enhance your entertainment pleasure.

I was tempted, but I skipped buying the t-shirt. And for the record, I really don’t feel that I’ve seen it all.

Satisfied that we’d debunked a major conspiracy theory (at least in our own minds), we headed back to the car and on to Tucson. Enough excitement for one day.

We were home the next day, but not for long. Join us next time for Three Days in Lake Havasu City, Arizona as we join hot air balloon pilot, Jeff and his wonder dog, Bandit, and try our hands as balloon ground/chase crew at the 11th Havasu Balloon Festival and Fair.